Everyone Wants The Porn Star Experience; No One Wants The Porn Star
They seek it on the computer, they seek it in the brothels and they seek it in the bedroom. Everyone wants the porn star experience. But no one wants the porn star.
With the continuing practice of pulling the sheets over our heads when it comes to sex ed in America, young people are hardly prepared for what lies ahead of them. Often sex ed in school is nothing but fear tactics and STDs. In fact, 50 percent of 914 young people surveyed, according to The Guardian, rated their sex education as poor or terrible. Consequently, many young people take to the internet experience to learn. And they are learning. But what they are learning is the problem.
Dr. Gail Dines, a professor of sociology and women’s studies, explains, “The biggest sex educator of young men today is pornography, which is increasingly violent and dehumanizing, and it changes the way men view women.” The porn star experience. When boys are learning about sex through the warped lens of pornography, it is no wonder they’re losing their ability to respect and honor women, as slut shaming and rape culture breed and increase.
The porn star experience, from the guy’s point of view, is all for his pleasure and often at the expense of the girl’s dignity, and sometimes, humanity. The increase in POV and gonzo porn delivers a clear message of what girls should be doing in the bedroom and guys are trying to take that message to real life. This is what men and boys are learning to expect in a relationship. Instead of understanding healthy relationships exhibit respect, they are learning that they exhibit power.
And this is rubbing off (no pun intended) on the girls. If a young girl watches this same porn or adheres to these boys’ expectations, she is putting herself in the middle of a double entendre of a mess. That is what the boys want, right? Except when it’s not.
The boy has been taught by porn to think; this is what I want, this is sexy. But at the very same time, he is being taught, or he just believes, that any girl who would act this way is a whore. And the girl falls in the middle as well. One night she is celebrated, the next day she is shamed, and then, confused. See, pornography is blemishing the way men see women, and I think, how women see themselves. Impressionable minds are seeing pornography at a younger and younger age. Is it so crazy to think it’s altering their views?
As an illustration, our world is starting to mirror theirs. STD ridden. Condomless. Belittling of women. Rape equating to a slap on the wrist. Prostitution and sex trafficking. You don’t think our obsession with porn has contributed at all? Dr. Sharon Mitchell tells Court TV that 66 percent of porn actors and actresses have herpes. And our world? More than half of all people, according to The American Sexual Health Association, will have an STD/STI in their lifetime. And it doesn’t end there.
Victor Malarek explains in his book, “Pornography fuels prostitution, and prostitution fuels the sex trade.” It is linked. It is supply and demand. It is a mindset. Malarek interviewed many Johns that pay for sex in brothels and many admit to pornography being their commercial, their advertisement of what they will pay for, what they’re seeking. So boys and dirty Johns alike… Both want the porn star experience.
But who wants the porn star?
Who wants the girl who slept with 300 people this month? Who wants the girl who has herpes? Who is seeking their life-partner when they loom online?
In the same fashion, the porn world business operates. They treat their actresses the same. They want them now, for their pleasure. But they don’t value them. They use them, abuse them and move on. Tanya Burleson, known as “Jersey Jaxin,” said, “Guys are punching you in the face. You get ripped. Your insides come out of you. It’s never ending. You’re viewed as an object, not as a human with a spirit.” The porn industry views them the same way as the viewer is learning to view them. And that is how we are educating young people and adults alike on sex. When speaking about female porn stars who are now out of the industry, Vikki Dark, a former porn star writes, “In the end, we all feel ruined by it.”
So what are we teaching? What are we learning? What do we want? Women with no spirit? Sex with no ties? Confused, uninformed boys and girls? Perverted and twisted ‘business’ and slave trade? Because if that’s what you want, you already have it.
And it is called the Porn Star Experience.
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